Tags
anxiety, beauty, body image, ego, equality, feminism, gay, Health, love, men, pornography, rape, relationships, spirituality, women
Where do I begin? Brace yourself, this is going to be a long one. A lot of ground to cover on this topic. Female body image, is one of the biggest subjects used in the suppression of women. Just about every single girl, if not every single one, is influenced in some way or another about how her body ought to look. From very young ages. Just the idea of having a barbie doll begins to cultivate a certain mindset about what the female form is supposed to look like, to compete with the standards of society. From very young ages, girls are influenced on how to dress and how to behave like a girl. Men get the same kind of influence, but this isn’t about men right now, it’s about women. From young ages, everything to do with a girls life, is about being beautiful, it’s about wearing cute clothes, to the introduction of make up at the youngest possible age, to make their faces prettier. Which automatically makes them believe their face isn’t pretty enough as it is.
As they are being conditioned in this way, they grow up with everything they see on tv, or magazines, or music, setting their standards for them. Every clothing store they walk into, there are pictures of women on the walls, even the mannequins are rail thin hinting at the standard of beauty that appears to be acceptable. Magazines with all sorts of tips and tricks, and products they can buy to make them more beautiful, with pictures of other women, who have been airbrushed and photoshopped to appear much more beautiful than they actually are. Making other women only dream of being like them, even though they’re not real to begin with. You can’t be like the woman in the magazine, if the woman in the magazine isn’t like the woman in the magazine. It’s all a lie. A lie that has women starving themselves, and competing against each other.
Every time a woman looks at another woman, jealous of her looks, they suppress each other. They keep each other in line. And to continue this mindset, along come men, with their standard of beauty, which as also been conditioned into them by society, to expect the women in magazines to be walking around. So women not only compete against each other, but also to impress a man. This begins in high school. By the time boys are 15 years old, they are having conversations about girls, and rating them on a hotness scale of 1 to 10. Pornography doesn’t help with this either, and most 15 year old boys get many ideas about women through porn sites. So boys grow up with standards, and girls grow up with the expectation of standards.
When a girl feels that she can’t meet these standards many things begin to swirl in her mind. Which often leads to the development of anxiety, eating disorders, suicidal tendencies, low self esteem, insecurity, and self loathing. So they go to extreme lengths, including starving themselves, and putting their health in jeopardy as a result. Then doctors come along and treat them for anxiety, and other disorders, rather than understanding the cause of the problems. So now we have medicated girls, that are misunderstood, and confused about what to do about that. So they begin to think something is wrong with them. But the standards don’t just go away. No, they see it everywhere, they are reminded by everything. So the torment continues, many hours putting make up on, making sure the right clothes fit and mix together and all the parts of the body she may not like are covered. Then she goes out into the world, and gets complimented on how good she looks, but she doesn’t believe the compliments are about her. She thinks it’s about her outfit or her make up, not whats behind them. So the compliments only last for as long as she’s wearing the same clothes. Then the anxiety of it all becomes overwhelming, she thinks she has to try so hard to fit in, to be beautiful. The anxiety medication is a welcoming remedy. It will alleviate the stress. Until the next time she must go out, in which, she will stress for several hours, if not days before it.
This is the relationship girls develop with themselves. Because they feel this way about themselves, men, not knowing any of this, think women are sex objects. So this male mindset, makes women believe that sex is all about men. That women are the object of a mans desire. So from this, male mindset, combined with the conditioned female mindset, we invent the pornography industry, and along with that, prostitution, and the whole sex slave industry. As well as advertising using women to sell products. All of these industries remain in business only because women are conditioned to keep these industries open. All of these industries, feed male desire, male lust, which keeps men in ignorance of it all. Men are encouraged to sleep with as many women as possible. It’s all about male desire. Have you ever noticed how many industries are based around female desire, and the objectification of men?
You will notice however, that anytime a man decides to wear or do anything feminine, he is instantly shut down. ”Don’t be a pussy.” Or, “He must be a fag.” Or other sayings like ” you throw like a girl” or ” what a girl.” A man cannot go into public wearing feminine clothes, or even feminine colors or painted nails. He will instantly be judged by not only men, but women too. But what is it all really doing? It’s saying that anything feminine is weak, and needs to be put in its proper place, and is for women only. Yet the moment, you see a woman wearing a mans sweater, all his friends will be giving him a high five. A sign of achievement, a flag of victory. What you don’t see, is anyone insulting her for wearing male clothes. There are no sayings that insult the male gender in the same way. Most insults that are said in relation to a man, use feminine undertones. Which perpetuates the mindset in both men and women, that women are inferior to men.
Then there is the whole rape culture that we have in our society, where the victim is blamed for being raped. That her clothes were too provocative, so she was asking for it. Or getting her drunk or on drugs, or just getting her to invite him into her house. This is not consent. However, men’s desire doesn’t care much about consent, and because men are not taught how to handle their desires, because it’s drilled into them from every angle, they will take advantage as often as they can. The definition of consent can be bent, and often broken in their horny desperation. So this trauma just makes things worse for a girl that already has body image issues. Making them afraid to even date, to ever trust a man again, if they ever developed trust in the first place.
On top of all this, is the amount of attention women get from men. Just by being female, the attention, wanted or unwanted is going to be coming their way, from catcalls walking down the street to creepy hooded dudes that stalk them. Go on craigslist, and to the M4W section in any city, and see how many men are looking for women in a single day. Then go to the W4M section of that same city, and see how many women are looking for men, within the same 24 hour time frame. You will find, 100’s of men in one day, and about 10 women. Those 10 women that have an ad out looking, receive hundreds of replies, with many penis pictures to sort through. And we wonder why women give up on men?
It gets worse. Dating and relationships. Women, always trying to look their best, trying to date men, that want the impression she’s putting on, while he’s putting on an impression of his own, to impress her. So for a little while their impressions hold up, but eventually, each impression begins to break down, and he becomes his usual asshole horny self, and she becomes insecure and hating her looks asking if she looks fat in those jeans. The false attraction, the false impressions have left the relationship.Which is replaces by a sense of longing, and dullness. Yet they both remain in the relationship, because she doesn’t believe she deserves better, and he’s probably cheating on her with someone else, and if not, he keeps her around because it gets him off. So many women will remain in a relationship like this, even if it’s abusive. Often mistaking their lack of self worth, with the idea of love. Or believing that this is the best they can do, and they would never find anyone else.
Female desire is something that’s also a bit taboo. A sexually promiscious woman is slut shamed, and thought badly of. Which is very counter intuitive to the conditioning, seeing as women are made into sex objects, but the minute a woman has sex with a few men, she’s a slut. How is that for confusing? Female desire, in touch with her own sex drive, with her own idea of what turns her on, is something many men cannot handle. Which is quite evident by the fact that many women never even experience an orgasm throughout the course of their lives. So women are taught to be sex objects, but only for men’s desire, not for their own. So to add to all of the above issues, we now also have sexually unsatisfied women, who have no idea what they’re missing, and sex is this mediocre thing. Making the female orgasm, a taboo subject! Most movies are even about him getting off, rather than her. So as a result of all this, trust, vulnerability, surrender, intimacy, passion, romance, are fleeting at best for many women. Which is a crime against humanity. And I mean that literally.
Well I have news for you. For every woman alive today. It’s all bullshit. Everything you think you are, everything you’ve been taught, told, or learned, it’s all bullshit. Every last bit of it. You are as beautiful as the next woman. You may not have the same physical appearance, but no other woman can be you. You cannot be replaced. Your body is yours. It does not belong to anyone else. You have to live in your body, your body is your home, it is your temple. Any person, that doesn’t see beauty in that, is not worth your time. You are worth more than that. You are not defined by your looks, you are defined by your actions. You are defined by how you treat others, by how kind you are, by how caring you are, by how you make others feel. That includes yourself. You can respect yourself, in the same manner that you can respect others. You were born to be you. To be respected. You are allowed to do anything you want to do, and if others don’t like it, that’s not your problem. Dress how you want to dress, wear what you want to wear, fuck who you want to fuck(with consent), say what you want to say, and be who you want to be. You do not have to impress anyone, or prove yourself for any reason. You don’t owe an explanation for being who you are. You do not have to meet societies standards, or men’s standards, or anyone standards. You can, in this very moment, accept your body exactly as it is, and be happy with it. If you feel bad about your own body, then observe your reaction, observe the feelings that rumble through you, and know this, you have a choice, you can react to those feelings, or you can feel them fully, and accept yourself anyway. Own your body. You live in it, it keeps you alive, you use it to express yourself, and you use it to explore the world. If you drop everything you have ever learned about what beauty is, and you just start living your life the way you want to live your life, you will meet people that see the real you. You will find relationships, friends, groups, that all see the real you, the you that has let go of trying to impress and prove, the you that is carefree and in complete acceptance, in love with yourself. Do you want to be in a relationship with someone that you have to try to impress through looks, or someone that sees the real you, with the gloves off, and the pimples out, and the stretch marks basking in the sun? Wouldn’t it be nice to have someone find you beautiful just as you are? How can they ever find you, if you don’t accept yourself just as you are? You are you, you are perfectly imperfect, and that’s the way it is. Only change yourself if YOU want to change yourself, and if you can’t change yourself, then accept yourself as you are, because it’s who you are meant to be. No one can compete with that. That’s what makes you beautiful. BE YOU TI FUL.